BetrayaL
Friend :- A person whom one knows.. likes.. and trusts...
I didn’t want to believe the things that happened before I left for work yesterday and things that happened at work yesterday. How I wish it didn’t happen and how I wish it was not true. But sad to say it did happened and it had a tremendous effect on me. I didn’t have much time to actually think about it coz I was really occupied with work yesterday and I thank my lucky stars for that. At least something was on my side. It wasn’t till I sat down on the MRT on the way home and finally think bout what had happened yesterday.
I felt betrayed.. Disappointed.. Filled with so much hatred and anger at that point of time. First and foremost stranger have the guts to call me names.. and as if that hasn’t ruin my day enough.. I got to know another thing.. Felt like being stabbed in the back by someone whom I define as a friend. In what way have I ever offended this person that this person I myself do not know. I do not want to believe what I have heard but when it’s said from two different people.. I dun know what to believe in and what not to believe in anymore. Who shall I trust now?? Someone whom I have looked upon as a friend does this to me and this person has left me wondering should I trust the group of friends that I have been hanging out with for the past year. Just who is this person I do not know and I can’t think of any at all. Maybe I put too much trust in them and I never see it coming. Guess this is the consequences that I have to face.
Part of me doesn’t wish to know who this someone is coz I dun want to ever end up hating this person.. but part of me wishes to know so that at least I could tell this someone that if ever I have done anything wrong or he is not happy bout the way I live my life or even my behavior.. please tell me straight in the face and do not go thru other people. All I know is that he is someone who is in the group that I always hang out with… n just by knowing that hurts me deep…
I Wonder
Just when I thought of writing something into this empty space yesterday.. My PC couldn’t start!! Aarrggh!! Felt like a tiny fish lost swimming in the open sea. Maybe it was just not my day.. * haiizz* But lucky me that my bro brought home the laptop!! Hehe… It’s been a while since I wrote into this empty space. The past week for me has not been all bed of roses. I thought everything was alright.. Things turn out to be nasty and to make it even worse.. my backache lately is tearing me apart..*ouch* Last Wednesday went out with my best friend and a friend of his.. It felt awkward though.. Felt like I’m the lamp post!! Hehe.. but it wasn’t that bad.. Sat down at esplanade enjoying our tub of ice cream oblivious to all the couples there.. haha!! My Saturday was well spent. I had a nice dinner outing with a group of people. Started off as total strangers but parted as ??? hmmm… I dun actually have word to describe it but let’s jus term it as friends. Hehe.. It’s a feeling I have not felt for a long time and thinking about that day makes me smile & laugh at the same time. Guess all begins well.. ends well.. *wink wink*
On the other hand.. seeing my friends and colleagues at work makes my day no matter how bad my other days had been. But yesterday I just realized that there are people around me putting up a brave front. Trying to be happy go lucky but only god knows how they feel inside. I see them laughing.. smiling as though their life are perfect but not till a close friend of mine who look up to me as a sister changed my perspective thinking. He actually gave me so much trust and put so much faith in me hoping that I could at least give my point of views. To think that he asked me to read his diary of his life.. his thoughts and emotions that he has been going thru. After reading.. I couldn’t hold back my tears as they jus decided to flow.. I eventually did give my point of views hoping to enlighten him or even help him in that sense but only I know myself better that I’m in no better position to actually to give advises when my thoughts are not even straightened out yet. It then struck to my mind and I started to ask myself questions even when I know that there is no answer to it…
Is life really that unfair?? Why do the bad things always have to happen to kind souls?? How many wrongs must they do before they have the chance to make it right?? How many times must they fall.. den pick themselves up again but eventually fall again?? Why do kind souls have to suffer while all those ‘bad’ ones enjoy their way thru life?? Or is it that it is the destiny of a kind soul to walk thru this kind a path for the rest of their lives?? Hmmm….
Ps: Thank you very much for the invitation of dinner the other day… * grins*
Is It True..
Trying to move on, getting on with my life. I sleep through the day and fight through the night. As I sit in this total darkness , my mind began to wonder.. I thought I fell in love once, and suddenly i realise... True Love is overrated, and maybe its never meant for one like me.Why did I left myself open, entrenched and blinded by love's design. Engulfed by its passion, utterly lost in space in time. Knowing that the end was inevitable, still I made the dubious choice and felt a pain immeasurable just by listening to my heart's voice. What is love but a feeling, a word often used in jest. An ephemeral emotion, not worth the time to develop and invest. A captivating story, an ending only where it starts. Its an all-too predictable cycle, in this game of broken hearts.Though yielding temporary happiness, it always ends in bitter grief. The absence of all hope and faith, of comfort and relief. The hurt I'm feeling now won't disappear overnight, but some way somehow i know everything will turn out alright.
~*"There once was a girl who had everything, she fell in love, and lost it all.."*~
WaT Da Heck
Can't believe it... REDS won and juventus lost!!! DUH!!! made me a lost my bets with two peepz.. well one isnt so bad cos its only over a cup of coffee (not sure if its for real) but the other... guess i'm gonna be broke!! hehe... should have just keep my mouth shut.. hmmm... hope they'll forgot all about it & i get away scott free!!! ... hahahaha *evil grins*
On leave 2day...Been bumming around da whole day not doing anything.. can u believe dat?? Stayed on ma bed most of the time after having my shower and only goes out of da room either to relieve myself or eat.. wat a lazy bummer i'm gonna become and wondering if i can ever get myself fat.. hehehe (not fat as in dat fat but jus a bit more fleshy) heheh... ma peepz have been commenting dat i have lost so much weight.. (didnt realise dat).. if only they knew how much i've been stuffing myself with all those junk foods!! haha!! my fav!!
Well, apart from dat been listening to indon songs dat a friend passed to me recently.. never heard of these groupie before..didnt expect that it would be good... kinda gets to me everytime i hear it play on ma wmp... wee~
esp kksk... i likeeeee .. *wink wink*
 
HuRt..
*~I can forget the tears and the hurt you put me through, but I can't forget the laughs and special times I shared with you. no matter how much time goes by you will always be a part of my heart..coz I cant stop loving you even if I tried.I neva knew what luv was until I met u. I neva knew anythin so amazin until I knew u. I neva wanted anythin more until I wanted u. I neva missed anythin more until I lost u..I love you more than you'll ever know,but sometimes i feel its better if i let you go..~*
Juz 4 thoughts...
What do u do when the person u are suppose to spend the rest of ur life with, Is supposed to spend the rest of their life with someone else??
My Baby You
No matter where life would have taken us, remember who I am even though we're forced to give up..Never forget who I am as I was the one who loved you like no one else could and i am the one who would die for you and you know that I would.. I held your hand when times got tough...you were my only man that I really loved.. I stood by your side and never gave up even though I was in for a ride cos I love you that much.. Remember this face when we separate for life, I will miss you baby and I'm glad that we tried...
If Only You Knew
" Failure does not mean fatal, accept the truth with an open heart.. Do not run away from reality but face the music instead..Luv does not mean leading to the failure of our lives, but it leads to the failure of our heart.. Luv also does not mean foreva and luv does not mean any harm if you know what you're doing to yourself.. To forgive and forget is what a saint can do and we can only follow its footsteps.. Emotional feelings can be controlled if you have the will power to do so..Nothing you should think about but think about your future coz your future is in your hands..Only you, yourself can shape it into the shape you want...
|
AbOuT Me
